Monday, January 31, 2011

When Hope Hurts

It shouldn’t be true, but it is.

Sometimes it hurts to hope.

When you’re a mom
who’s tried every seizure-stopping medication known to mankind,
but seizures still attack your son several times a day...

Hope hurts.

When you’re wannabe-parents
who’ve spent all your savings and half-a-dozen years
to overcome infertility,
but you’re still,
inexplicably,
very definitely
not pregnant...

Hope hurts.

When you’re the dad of a teenage daughter
who’s never walked or talked
and is nearing the end of her high-school years,
and you have no idea how you'll care for her....
much less how you’ll pay for it...

Hope hurts.

When, like so many of my friends,
you’re a single woman
who is lovely, intelligent and downright-fun,
and you can’t figure out why God doesn’t say “yes”
to your repeated prayers for marriage and a family...

Then, too, hope hurts.
Oh, it hurts.

And sometimes
when hope hurts so deeply,
it seems safer not to hope at all.

Safer not to think about what could be ahead.
Safer not to hope,
not to plan,
and certainly not to expect...
that things could change.
It's definitely safer not to hope that things could get better.

But as many of us have learned
to our sorrow,
hopelessness has consequences, too.

It makes our hearts hard.
It makes us not-so-fun to be around.
And it takes away any good we might be to others
who come to us hoping that we'll give them hope.

I don’t know why God allows some of us to hurt so much.

I don’t know why He doesn’t promise that,
if we just hang on,
and always do the right thing,
it will all get better.

And I wish I knew how to fix the hurt of hoping!

But there are some things I do know.

When hope hurts, we’re not alone.
God has promised to be with us.
And He keeps His promises.

When hope hurts, someone understands how we feel.
When Jesus came to earth,
He experienced every emotion we feel...
So He understands.

When hope hurts, someone cares.
God doesn’t watch with disinterested objectivity,
As if we’re some kind of science experiment.
He cares about each of us.
He cares so much that He collects all our tears!

When hope hurts, someone hears when we cry.
When we cry out to God,
He never turns a deaf ear,
or closes the door to give Himself “a break” from our crying.
He always hears when we cry...
And He always listens.

When hope hurts, there’s always reason to hope.
We almost never understand it.
And it’s hardly ever easy.
But, somehow, in some way,
when we see the big picture,
God brings good out of our hard times.
He does,
and He will.
Even when it hurts to hope.

-- Reenie

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